Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Bittersweet.

So today is the day, my last appointment with Dr. John. It seems like yesterday that I found out that she was leaving (as told here). As I sit here getting ready to travel to Tustin one last time, I can not help but feel a little sad and a whole lot grateful! Six years ago I walked into her office a hot manic mess and today I am beyond blessed to have had her knowledge, wisdom, and gracefulness to guide me on my journey. She did not commit me when I told her that I was throwing a 'quit drinking party', she understood when I told her that I wanted my crazy to be more like an 'adorable little chihuahua', rather than the 'great dane' it had become, she quietly listened as tears fell while I wrestled with whether or not I should leave my job and she encouraged me when I proclaimed that I would embrace crazy as my super power. 


So today I say good-bye. How do I even start? It's a bit of a daunting task...at the risk of sounding dramatic, I feel like she saved my life...or more accurately, she set me on a life-saving path and has walked with me (at times carried me) until now. Tears well as I type, this is a lot more emotional than I expected, but that is ok. I look to a future that I know is bright. I know that my progress comes from within and that tomorrow nothing will have changed, I will still be me. I know that I will find another doctor who will walk the next part of my journey with me, but today I celebrate a woman who was placed in my life at a time when I needed her most. No matter what, she will always be a part of my crazy story.



4 comments:

  1. I love you, Jenn!

    And the Lord can do more for your heart, mind, and soul than any person on earth. He will always meet you where you are - especially when you cry out to Him and Him alone.

    You were blessed to have this doctor ... someone you could trust and totally feel free to be authentic when with her.

    You are a survivor - of all things.

    The Lord will meet you where you are ... every day, willingly, and longs to do so.

    I LOVE you!
    Michelle

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  2. did we already rule out that we had the same doctor?

    this is no small thing.

    so wish we could connect and share as our Lord has been showing me things re: bipolar .. :)

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  3. So how did it go? I'm assuming you already had the appointment and said goodbye?

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  4. You were blessed to have this doctor.

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